this past weekend was our "midterm" retreat. it is so hard to believe that i'm almost halfway done w/ my time here. i guess i always knew that it would "fly by," but now that the time actually is flying it is so hard to believe.
the weekend officially started on thursday night - we all met for drinks at this cool hotel/restaurant in town that kind of looks out onto the whole town. it's only a good place to get food if you're not hungry at all and you have about 4 hours to spare, but it's nice for drinks! after that, we went back to the hotel we stayed in during orientation for dinner, and then we slept over there - b/c if you stay in kakamega past dark, there's really no point in trying to go back home. which sounds like it could be expensive, but actually, it only costed about $4 per person, so we splurged. there were four of us hanging out at the hotel, and for some reason, we all ended up getting haircuts. with kiddie scissors. and suprisingly, everyone looks pretty good
then we took friday off from work (i feel like i'm getting a real glimpse of the working world - i like my job but it was nice to get a day off) and went to the kakamega forest which is about an hour away. one of the interns actually lives and works out there, at an NGO focused on environmental conservation. so, she was able to give us a big tour and show us around her home!
we stayed at these things called "bandas" - basically like hotel rooms on stilts. i'm not sure why the rooms were raised off the ground but it did make it seem more vacation-y or something. we spent most of our time there just talking, playing cards, eating, and taking hikes. the first day, we took a hike to a look-out tower, and just looked out onto part of the forest. it was beautiful and a picture could not do it justice (that's going to be my excuse for not taking pictures - sorry!)
the next day, we woke up and took a picnic-hike to a river which was about 2 hours away. it was really awesome; it's amazing that the forest is just so huge. on the way back, we got rained on but it was actually really cool to be walking through the rain forest in the rain! on our way back, we cut through this retreat-vacation place called Rondo. from the looks of it, that's where all the rich european/american bird-watchers go. it looked sort of like pleasantville, in the middle of rural kenya... kind of weird. we had many discussions about that whole issue of traveling to another very different country and then staying somewhere that totally doesn't represent the real country at all, but the only conclusion we came to was that we had no conclusion. anyway. something to think about, i guess. they did serve actual, made-from-a-coffee-maker coffee, though, so it did have some redeeming qualities.
the next morning (sunday) we woke up at 4:30 and took a sunrise hike to the top of a hill. it was probably the most physically demanding thing i've done in a long time, especially so early in the morning, but it was totally worth it. watching the sun rise over this beautiful forest was so amazing. after that, we went back to Rondo for breakfast - i'm not sure how i felt about that place in general, but the breakfast was incredible, especially after hiking for a few hours.
after that, it was back to reality. but, that's a good thing. when we arrived back in town on sunday, i felt like i was returning home. kind of like the feeling you get when you're coming home from vacation and you see your town's exit ramp sign on the highway. like, ah it's hard to come back after such a good time, but also, it's good to be back somewhere familiar, somewhere comfortable.
i know i still haven't talked much about my actual job here - it's not b/c it's not going well, it's just b/c it's ever-changing, and after working a whole day, i normally feel like writing about something else- but i promise to soon!!
Thursday, October 25, 2007
Wednesday, October 17, 2007
a day in the life
well i guess i've never actually talked about what everyday life is like for me here, so i will try to do that! unfortunately, i don't think i can accurately describe the sounds and smells, but hopefully this will do, anyway.
each day starts around 6 am, when i wake up (w/o the help of an alarm clock, hopefully i will be able to carry this skill on once i'm back in college, b/c i really hate the sound of alarms). i normally go out the pit latrine first thing, since i'm in a perpetual state of "having to go to the bathroom... or latrine" since i've been here. everyone drinks chai all the time, and there's just something about it that goes right through you. i pretty much always wake up in the middle of the night, at least once, having to go to the bathroom, but i never do, b/c that means getting out of bed, unlocking the door and leaving the house, going down a flight of stairs, and making my way across the yard - past the holes and piles of cow dug, and finally reaching the pit latrine. and then coming back. this whole process is too overwhelming for me to deal w/ at 2 in the morning, so i normally just lay in bed and try to fall back asleep. anyway, i'm not sure if you needed/wanted to hear that, but that's my ongoing middle-of-the-night struggle.
so after that, i will sometimes go for a walk by myself. yesterday, i went for a run. well, a run/walk. i ran the whole way, except for when the road was muddy, when the road was uneven and i thought i'd sprain an ankle trying to run, or when i saw people. so i ran about 5% of the time. i've never seen anyone running or exercising for fun here (sidenote: this begs the question, if nobody runs, then why are all the best distance runners in the world from kenya? where do those runners train? how do they get into the sport? i've yet to see them). whenever i'm out in public, i am basically the white american freakshow, so the white american freakshow running is an even weirder sight, so i'd rather just walk and not run when i see people on the road, and try to maintain a little dignity. when i came back from my run yesterday, my host mom asked me where i was, and when i told her i was running she just laughed and asked me why.
so after my walk/run, i come back to the house and take a bucket shower. every once in a while a baby chick or a human baby will wander into the wash room. either way, it/she/he is making a lot of high-pitched noise.
after that, i get dressed for the day - for work, i normally wear a button-down and a casual skirt. i had planned to wear dressy shoes every day, but after my first day of work, i decided it's much easier to wear flip-flops. maybe not the most professional thing, but much more practical. i have a few different work outfits, so it doesn't take too long to pick out what to wear. it's amazing how fast the "getting ready" process takes when you don't have a mirror.
once i'm ready, i go into the dining room to take tea and eat breakfast. every morning, i get my whole pot of chai (probably about 8 cups worth - i really hope someone else is finishing it once i leave, b/c i'm only up to 2 cups so far) and 4 pieces of bread with butter and jam. my main food group here is carbohydrates, by far. a few vegetables, sometimes meat, always tons of carbs. i met a peace corps volunteer here who said that the female pc volunteers in kenya always gain weight, and the guys always lose weight. so that's great. i have been taking multi-vitamins for the first time in my life though. i always intend to, but now it seems like i have a legitimate reason to. i am starting to love the chai, though. every time i dump a spoonful of sugar into my cup of tea, i feel like i'm losing some integrity as a black coffee drinker, but oh well... when in rome?? most days i eat breakfast alone (everyone else in my family is hardcore and has been awake for hours, so they've already eaten) so i normally read while i eat. the other day, i was reading my bible, and my host sister came to talk to me and see what i was reading. when i showed her, she said "you read that other book very quickly! will you be done w/ this one quickly, too?" i said i wasn't sure but i think it might take longer than a few days.
after that, i pack up my bag and head out. i have about a 10 minute walk to the main road, where i catch a matatu (bus) into town. some days this takes 1 minute, some days i have to wait for 20 minutes. today i sat next to some military guy with a huge gun on his lap. so that was weird. the driver had mariah carey playing, though, so i didn't mind. i find that God is encouraging me in little ways all the time through random things like matatu music - like when i'm having a frustrating day but then i walk by a matatu blasting celine dion music from the 90's. it's so odd. in a weird way it makes me feel comfortable and happy, though. the other day, my matatu was playing abba. i'm not sure if there's a whiter musical group in the world, but lo and behold, their music lives on in the young men of western kenya.
ok so i've only gotten to my morning - but soon i will write about my work day! things are starting to shape up, there, so hopefully i will have some good things to share soon. i am starting a program where i go into local primary schools to teach about agroforestry, environmental issues in kenya, and to do some tree planting. i did take an environmental ethics class last semester, so i think that makes me an expert. just kidding - actually, this project has nothing to do w/ what i'm studying and it's totally not what i expected to be doing, but i'm really excited about it. if i were teaching business, i would probably be just as lost, as well. all the teachers i have talked to have told me how important planting plants and trees is here, so i am excited to be able to be a part of that. i don't know what i'm doing really, but the people i work w/ do, so i think it will be a good thing, despite my weaknesses.
well i will write more about my crazy job later! thanks for reading! you are all in my thoughts and prayers!
ohh also - i will be going shopping in a couple of weekends, so if you have something you'd like, please let me know!! the place we're going has a whole bunch of different stuff - jewelry, art, carvings, clothes, fabric, dinnerware-type stuff, tons of other stuff... i will try my best to find it, and if i can't, i'll get you something else cool! so just leave me a message or email me!
each day starts around 6 am, when i wake up (w/o the help of an alarm clock, hopefully i will be able to carry this skill on once i'm back in college, b/c i really hate the sound of alarms). i normally go out the pit latrine first thing, since i'm in a perpetual state of "having to go to the bathroom... or latrine" since i've been here. everyone drinks chai all the time, and there's just something about it that goes right through you. i pretty much always wake up in the middle of the night, at least once, having to go to the bathroom, but i never do, b/c that means getting out of bed, unlocking the door and leaving the house, going down a flight of stairs, and making my way across the yard - past the holes and piles of cow dug, and finally reaching the pit latrine. and then coming back. this whole process is too overwhelming for me to deal w/ at 2 in the morning, so i normally just lay in bed and try to fall back asleep. anyway, i'm not sure if you needed/wanted to hear that, but that's my ongoing middle-of-the-night struggle.
so after that, i will sometimes go for a walk by myself. yesterday, i went for a run. well, a run/walk. i ran the whole way, except for when the road was muddy, when the road was uneven and i thought i'd sprain an ankle trying to run, or when i saw people. so i ran about 5% of the time. i've never seen anyone running or exercising for fun here (sidenote: this begs the question, if nobody runs, then why are all the best distance runners in the world from kenya? where do those runners train? how do they get into the sport? i've yet to see them). whenever i'm out in public, i am basically the white american freakshow, so the white american freakshow running is an even weirder sight, so i'd rather just walk and not run when i see people on the road, and try to maintain a little dignity. when i came back from my run yesterday, my host mom asked me where i was, and when i told her i was running she just laughed and asked me why.
so after my walk/run, i come back to the house and take a bucket shower. every once in a while a baby chick or a human baby will wander into the wash room. either way, it/she/he is making a lot of high-pitched noise.
after that, i get dressed for the day - for work, i normally wear a button-down and a casual skirt. i had planned to wear dressy shoes every day, but after my first day of work, i decided it's much easier to wear flip-flops. maybe not the most professional thing, but much more practical. i have a few different work outfits, so it doesn't take too long to pick out what to wear. it's amazing how fast the "getting ready" process takes when you don't have a mirror.
once i'm ready, i go into the dining room to take tea and eat breakfast. every morning, i get my whole pot of chai (probably about 8 cups worth - i really hope someone else is finishing it once i leave, b/c i'm only up to 2 cups so far) and 4 pieces of bread with butter and jam. my main food group here is carbohydrates, by far. a few vegetables, sometimes meat, always tons of carbs. i met a peace corps volunteer here who said that the female pc volunteers in kenya always gain weight, and the guys always lose weight. so that's great. i have been taking multi-vitamins for the first time in my life though. i always intend to, but now it seems like i have a legitimate reason to. i am starting to love the chai, though. every time i dump a spoonful of sugar into my cup of tea, i feel like i'm losing some integrity as a black coffee drinker, but oh well... when in rome?? most days i eat breakfast alone (everyone else in my family is hardcore and has been awake for hours, so they've already eaten) so i normally read while i eat. the other day, i was reading my bible, and my host sister came to talk to me and see what i was reading. when i showed her, she said "you read that other book very quickly! will you be done w/ this one quickly, too?" i said i wasn't sure but i think it might take longer than a few days.
after that, i pack up my bag and head out. i have about a 10 minute walk to the main road, where i catch a matatu (bus) into town. some days this takes 1 minute, some days i have to wait for 20 minutes. today i sat next to some military guy with a huge gun on his lap. so that was weird. the driver had mariah carey playing, though, so i didn't mind. i find that God is encouraging me in little ways all the time through random things like matatu music - like when i'm having a frustrating day but then i walk by a matatu blasting celine dion music from the 90's. it's so odd. in a weird way it makes me feel comfortable and happy, though. the other day, my matatu was playing abba. i'm not sure if there's a whiter musical group in the world, but lo and behold, their music lives on in the young men of western kenya.
ok so i've only gotten to my morning - but soon i will write about my work day! things are starting to shape up, there, so hopefully i will have some good things to share soon. i am starting a program where i go into local primary schools to teach about agroforestry, environmental issues in kenya, and to do some tree planting. i did take an environmental ethics class last semester, so i think that makes me an expert. just kidding - actually, this project has nothing to do w/ what i'm studying and it's totally not what i expected to be doing, but i'm really excited about it. if i were teaching business, i would probably be just as lost, as well. all the teachers i have talked to have told me how important planting plants and trees is here, so i am excited to be able to be a part of that. i don't know what i'm doing really, but the people i work w/ do, so i think it will be a good thing, despite my weaknesses.
well i will write more about my crazy job later! thanks for reading! you are all in my thoughts and prayers!
ohh also - i will be going shopping in a couple of weekends, so if you have something you'd like, please let me know!! the place we're going has a whole bunch of different stuff - jewelry, art, carvings, clothes, fabric, dinnerware-type stuff, tons of other stuff... i will try my best to find it, and if i can't, i'll get you something else cool! so just leave me a message or email me!
Wednesday, October 10, 2007
happy moi day?
today is a kenyan national holiday - moi day. it's named for kenya's second president, who, from what i can tell, wasn't a very good president. he was pretty corrupt, and the current president (who isn't that great, either) was a big step up from him. however, that didn't stop him from instituting his own holiday. and from what my host mom said, he didn't even wait until he was out of office, he just made it "moi day" from the very beginning of his presidency. i guess it would sort of be like if bush said "umm ok october 10th will now be known as george w. bush day... just b/c i feel like it." in 2001. hmm. i'm not sure how well that would've worked out.
anyway, people seem to be less excited about actually celebrating moi than they are about having a day of rest - which makes sense. for some of the people, the day isn't much different than any other day - they still have to work, clean, take care of kids, cook, etc... but for most of the white collar workers, they get the day off. i didn't even know today was a holiday until last night when my boss sent me a text message saying not to come to work today, b/c the office will be closed. sure. why not. i tried to do some research online for my project, but so far i've just been checking my email. so today has been pretty unproductive. i woke up, took my bucket shower, drank tea and ate my bread and butter, played with my host sisters and brothers for a while, and then came into town. i ate lunch w/ a few other interns - i've started eating breakfast food at lunch b/c it's the best thing on the menu, and it costs about half as much.
it's really interesting coming from my college life to this life. first of all, i am in bed by 8 or 8:30 most nights - i'm generally pretty tired from the day, plus we eat huge dinners so those always make me full and sleepy, and it's dark so there's not much else to do except sleep. then, i'm up the next morning around 6:30. it's funny to think about how hard it normally is for me to wake up before my 8 am classes, and here i'm wide awake at 6:30. part of it is the roosters crowing, part is the sunlight streaming through the window, but most of it is my 1-year-old host brother who begins crying and screaming anywhere from 3 am to 6 am each morning. it's always a fun surprise to see when he'll start screaming. at first i thought he was just sick, but my host mom informed me that he's perfectly healthy - just kind of a whiner. kind of... i've stopped using an alarm clock, b/c i'm fairly confident that his screaming is raising some farm animals from the dead, so it's definitely enough to wake me up. at first, he really annoyed me. i love the other children, but i'll be honest, i really didn't like this child. hearing him cry was enough to make me never want children. but now, i'm actually just more amazed at his lung capacity than angry at how loud he is. last night, he screamed so loud that i literally felt my ear drums vibrate. i've never heard a kid that loud. i think that, when he grows up, he'll probably be a shy kid who barely ever talks. it has to balance out at some point. at least i hope, for his mom's sake.
i love every day here, b/c no matter how much i plan, there are hardly any constants from day to day. at times, that can be frustrating, but it's also really fun. on sunday, i went to church with my host family. they informed me that we would be going to a different church than they normally go to, b/c the vice president (moodi awory - i think that's his name, probably the wrong spelling) was going to be there to "dedicate" the church. or something like that. so, we walked to the church and there were hundreds of people standing outside. i thought we were going to go in, maybe catch a glimpse of the vp, but my host sisters kept walking - they crossed the street and walked onto this big field area. in the middle of a huge group of people was a helicopter that the vice president had flown in on. there were probably just as many people gathered around the helicopter as were in the actual church. i wasn't really sure what we were looking at or why we were standing around this helicopter (which, granted, was a nice-looking helicopter) and then i realized that probably a lot of people there had never seen something like that. my host sisters then informed me that we would be getting our picture taken in front of the helicopter. i'm not sure who took the picture, or if my host family will ever see the picture, but we did it anyway. i guess it might be akin to meeting a celebrity and taking your picture w/ him or her. i'm not sure. in any case, it was quite an odd "church service." after that, i thought we'd actually be going to church, but my host sisters said, no we're just going home to eat lunch. while i was waiting in the picture-taking line, i talked to a police officer who informed me that he had friends in chicago and that he thought people should stop worshiping the helicopter and go inside to worship God. he laughed for a long time and thought that joke was pretty fun. it was pretty interesting - it was hard to understand the intensity of that event: having the vice president come to your church, and seeing any sort of aircraft for the first time in your life.
sometimes i just feel like i'm living in this crazy adventure and everything i see and do are just players in my adventure. like growing up, in english classes, when i learned about the components of a story - the plot, setting, characters, action, etc... but this isn't a story. these "characters" whose lives i am watching (and am privileged to be a part of) are my host family, and these are their lives. every day when i'm at home with them, i get to be a part of their lives and their stories - not the other way around.
i found clean & clear facewash at the store today. it is always both weird and exciting to find western products. it was way overpriced, but i haven't used actual facewash in a month and i can definitely tell that i need it. sometimes, i think i'm getting really tan, but then i realize it's probably just dirt. which is ok, i kind of like it. sometimes i take extra care to wash my feet in the morning, even though i know i'll be walking in flip flops up a dirt road in the next 20 minutes. paved roads would help a lot in these areas - for so many reasons, but the dirt roads aren't bad, either. it has started to rain now and i think i forgot my rain jacket. that happens fairly often. both the raining and the forgetting. my feet (and the back of my skirt) are going to be muddy. it's nice to not really care, though.
anyway, people seem to be less excited about actually celebrating moi than they are about having a day of rest - which makes sense. for some of the people, the day isn't much different than any other day - they still have to work, clean, take care of kids, cook, etc... but for most of the white collar workers, they get the day off. i didn't even know today was a holiday until last night when my boss sent me a text message saying not to come to work today, b/c the office will be closed. sure. why not. i tried to do some research online for my project, but so far i've just been checking my email. so today has been pretty unproductive. i woke up, took my bucket shower, drank tea and ate my bread and butter, played with my host sisters and brothers for a while, and then came into town. i ate lunch w/ a few other interns - i've started eating breakfast food at lunch b/c it's the best thing on the menu, and it costs about half as much.
it's really interesting coming from my college life to this life. first of all, i am in bed by 8 or 8:30 most nights - i'm generally pretty tired from the day, plus we eat huge dinners so those always make me full and sleepy, and it's dark so there's not much else to do except sleep. then, i'm up the next morning around 6:30. it's funny to think about how hard it normally is for me to wake up before my 8 am classes, and here i'm wide awake at 6:30. part of it is the roosters crowing, part is the sunlight streaming through the window, but most of it is my 1-year-old host brother who begins crying and screaming anywhere from 3 am to 6 am each morning. it's always a fun surprise to see when he'll start screaming. at first i thought he was just sick, but my host mom informed me that he's perfectly healthy - just kind of a whiner. kind of... i've stopped using an alarm clock, b/c i'm fairly confident that his screaming is raising some farm animals from the dead, so it's definitely enough to wake me up. at first, he really annoyed me. i love the other children, but i'll be honest, i really didn't like this child. hearing him cry was enough to make me never want children. but now, i'm actually just more amazed at his lung capacity than angry at how loud he is. last night, he screamed so loud that i literally felt my ear drums vibrate. i've never heard a kid that loud. i think that, when he grows up, he'll probably be a shy kid who barely ever talks. it has to balance out at some point. at least i hope, for his mom's sake.
i love every day here, b/c no matter how much i plan, there are hardly any constants from day to day. at times, that can be frustrating, but it's also really fun. on sunday, i went to church with my host family. they informed me that we would be going to a different church than they normally go to, b/c the vice president (moodi awory - i think that's his name, probably the wrong spelling) was going to be there to "dedicate" the church. or something like that. so, we walked to the church and there were hundreds of people standing outside. i thought we were going to go in, maybe catch a glimpse of the vp, but my host sisters kept walking - they crossed the street and walked onto this big field area. in the middle of a huge group of people was a helicopter that the vice president had flown in on. there were probably just as many people gathered around the helicopter as were in the actual church. i wasn't really sure what we were looking at or why we were standing around this helicopter (which, granted, was a nice-looking helicopter) and then i realized that probably a lot of people there had never seen something like that. my host sisters then informed me that we would be getting our picture taken in front of the helicopter. i'm not sure who took the picture, or if my host family will ever see the picture, but we did it anyway. i guess it might be akin to meeting a celebrity and taking your picture w/ him or her. i'm not sure. in any case, it was quite an odd "church service." after that, i thought we'd actually be going to church, but my host sisters said, no we're just going home to eat lunch. while i was waiting in the picture-taking line, i talked to a police officer who informed me that he had friends in chicago and that he thought people should stop worshiping the helicopter and go inside to worship God. he laughed for a long time and thought that joke was pretty fun. it was pretty interesting - it was hard to understand the intensity of that event: having the vice president come to your church, and seeing any sort of aircraft for the first time in your life.
sometimes i just feel like i'm living in this crazy adventure and everything i see and do are just players in my adventure. like growing up, in english classes, when i learned about the components of a story - the plot, setting, characters, action, etc... but this isn't a story. these "characters" whose lives i am watching (and am privileged to be a part of) are my host family, and these are their lives. every day when i'm at home with them, i get to be a part of their lives and their stories - not the other way around.
i found clean & clear facewash at the store today. it is always both weird and exciting to find western products. it was way overpriced, but i haven't used actual facewash in a month and i can definitely tell that i need it. sometimes, i think i'm getting really tan, but then i realize it's probably just dirt. which is ok, i kind of like it. sometimes i take extra care to wash my feet in the morning, even though i know i'll be walking in flip flops up a dirt road in the next 20 minutes. paved roads would help a lot in these areas - for so many reasons, but the dirt roads aren't bad, either. it has started to rain now and i think i forgot my rain jacket. that happens fairly often. both the raining and the forgetting. my feet (and the back of my skirt) are going to be muddy. it's nice to not really care, though.
Wednesday, October 3, 2007
new revelations
i am quickly finding out that i would be a horrible kenyan woman.
when i first moved in with my host family, they were very surpised that, at age 20, not only did i not have children, but i'm not even married or, at the very least, engaged. at first, they seemed genuinely surprised about this, but after getting to know me, i think they are finally thinking "ahh yes, that makes sense that she's single. she doesn't know how to take care of anything." i've always thought i could do a decent job of taking care of myself - i can clean (as much as i feel is appropriate), cook (or at least find ways of feeding myself), and wash clothes (with an electronic washing machine). however, i'm coming to find out how ridiculous most of that probably is compared to how amazing these women are.
last night, my host mom had me sweep my floor for the first time. i honestly hadn't even considered this option until she pointed it out to me. but, it was good that i did, b/c the floor was a lot dirtier than i had thought. she let me sweep for about 5 seconds before grabbing the broom and doing the rest herself.
so, yesterday after work, i decided i should go home and wash my underwear. my host family graciously washes the rest of our clothes, but we're supposed to wash our own underwear, understandably. so, i went to the grocery store to get some detergent, but all i could find was fabric softener. and a lot of it. that's the thing about grocery stores here - you can find 800 varieties of toothpaste, but no floss. so, i decided that, although i don't think fabric softener actually cleans anything (i've never been quite clear on its purpose - why does fabric that is already soft need to be "re-softened" every time it's washed?), i bought it anyway, assuming that it's better than nothing. so, when i got home, i asked my host mom for a bucket to wash them in. she gave me one, and then proceeded to tell me how to wash them. i've washed clothes by hand before, so i thought i knew what i was doing, but apparently not. she finally just told me to soak all the underwear in soapy water for a few minutes. i could at least do that. then, a few minutes later, i tried to start washing them, but my host mom did not approve of my technique, so she just took over for me. and she decided that we needed actual soap, so she got some of her own to use. it is a weird/humbling/funny experience to watch someone you barely know wash your underwear and then help you hang it up to dry. but, it's done now, and my room at least smells good from having all that freshly-washed underwear hanging in it, so i guess that's a good sign.
i love times like last night though - sitting on the floor of my house, holding my little host sister, and watching my host mom wash clothes by the light of a kerosene lamp. i started out feeling like i was incapable of doing actual labor, and that the women here probably just pity how hapless american girls are - but i ended up just forgetting about our differences and soaking up the weirdness and joy of that whole evening. there's a time for analyzing differences, looking for needed changes, trying to change archaic gender roles and practices - but also seeing where i need change in my own life. but, there's also a time for just sitting and talking and being. and just living life in kenya. and accepting it and embracing it and just letting myself be. in some ways, it's so different from who i am, but in some ways, i just totally feel like me.
i guess the moral of the story is that i can't do basic things most 10-year-old kenyan girls can. and that fabric softener is not the same thing as detergent.
when i first moved in with my host family, they were very surpised that, at age 20, not only did i not have children, but i'm not even married or, at the very least, engaged. at first, they seemed genuinely surprised about this, but after getting to know me, i think they are finally thinking "ahh yes, that makes sense that she's single. she doesn't know how to take care of anything." i've always thought i could do a decent job of taking care of myself - i can clean (as much as i feel is appropriate), cook (or at least find ways of feeding myself), and wash clothes (with an electronic washing machine). however, i'm coming to find out how ridiculous most of that probably is compared to how amazing these women are.
last night, my host mom had me sweep my floor for the first time. i honestly hadn't even considered this option until she pointed it out to me. but, it was good that i did, b/c the floor was a lot dirtier than i had thought. she let me sweep for about 5 seconds before grabbing the broom and doing the rest herself.
so, yesterday after work, i decided i should go home and wash my underwear. my host family graciously washes the rest of our clothes, but we're supposed to wash our own underwear, understandably. so, i went to the grocery store to get some detergent, but all i could find was fabric softener. and a lot of it. that's the thing about grocery stores here - you can find 800 varieties of toothpaste, but no floss. so, i decided that, although i don't think fabric softener actually cleans anything (i've never been quite clear on its purpose - why does fabric that is already soft need to be "re-softened" every time it's washed?), i bought it anyway, assuming that it's better than nothing. so, when i got home, i asked my host mom for a bucket to wash them in. she gave me one, and then proceeded to tell me how to wash them. i've washed clothes by hand before, so i thought i knew what i was doing, but apparently not. she finally just told me to soak all the underwear in soapy water for a few minutes. i could at least do that. then, a few minutes later, i tried to start washing them, but my host mom did not approve of my technique, so she just took over for me. and she decided that we needed actual soap, so she got some of her own to use. it is a weird/humbling/funny experience to watch someone you barely know wash your underwear and then help you hang it up to dry. but, it's done now, and my room at least smells good from having all that freshly-washed underwear hanging in it, so i guess that's a good sign.
i love times like last night though - sitting on the floor of my house, holding my little host sister, and watching my host mom wash clothes by the light of a kerosene lamp. i started out feeling like i was incapable of doing actual labor, and that the women here probably just pity how hapless american girls are - but i ended up just forgetting about our differences and soaking up the weirdness and joy of that whole evening. there's a time for analyzing differences, looking for needed changes, trying to change archaic gender roles and practices - but also seeing where i need change in my own life. but, there's also a time for just sitting and talking and being. and just living life in kenya. and accepting it and embracing it and just letting myself be. in some ways, it's so different from who i am, but in some ways, i just totally feel like me.
i guess the moral of the story is that i can't do basic things most 10-year-old kenyan girls can. and that fabric softener is not the same thing as detergent.
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